Happy B-earth-day, Applesauce! Another 02/22 is here and even though you’re not, it’s still an occasion to celebrate you! Sweet Sixteen, Saucers!!! Your presence hasn’t dissipated and your energy is still active, some days more than others, but yes. Your legacy continues with little signs here and there, flashes of memories, anniversary dates (both happy & sad) and so much more. Your being is woven into our lives like a golden thread (no pun intended).
So today, we celebrate you – who you were, the spirit you are and the love you provided and so much more. Happy b-earth-day, my beautiful girl.
“Death is the starlit strip between the companionship of yesterday and the reunion of tomorrow.” ~ Mark Twain
Four years ago was our last night together. We were living our reality and knew the chapter would soon be closed on our journey together – at least physically. We had a restless night and the next morning after I washed your face, you put your paw weakly on my arm. While I held you, you took things into your own paws and died in my lap. Not more than 10 minutes before, you knew I had made “the call” and you chose to do it your way. I played Frank Sinatra’s “My Way” over and over that day. The words were too poignant to ignore.
“And now, the end is near And so I face the final curtain My friend, I’ll say it clear I’ll state my case, of which I’m certain I’ve lived a life that’s full I traveled each and every highway And more, much more than this, I did it my way”
Oh Applesauce, how has it been four years since you left? In some ways, it seems like forty years, in other ways, just yesterday. Not a day goes by where you’re not thought about, mentioned, or reliving memories that pop up on Facebook – some make me laugh, and some tug at my heart a little harder. (The one positive I can say about FB is it’s contained so many memories of you, you will live on in infamy, if only in my little world.) Although you were loved by so many in your own right. So today, pictures will speak louder than words.
I know when you’re close by and I have to say – can you teach Kiwi a thing about manners? I know you were “Applegator” when you were a wee one, but now I have a “Kiwidile” chomping. It would have been fun to see you two together – alike in many ways, and soooo very different in other ways.
Anything water was your favorite – pool, lake, ocean, bathtub
You were always up for a good photoshoot
There are days when I would give anything to bury my face in your fur, kiss your nose and do our happy dancing.
I know you are happy and healthy – I can feel it – and that makes me happy.
Another year, another special day to remember all that you were. Not a day goes by that you’re not on my mind in one fashion or another. Pictures trigger memories, feelings, the highs, the lows. But most of all, your spirit and your beautiful soul.
Yes, this year Kiwi (sauce) is taking up my time – she’s a sassy handful for sure. I know you sent her – although did you have to send such a challenge? She’s a sweet fruit tart – but man, her sass is strong. As are her teeth and her bite. I often call her Applesauce without thinking – but I know you know that. She’s a bit of you – and while I complain about her biting and mouthing – I was reminded by your girl, that we often called you Applegator because of your own biting games.
I wish you were here to teach her the ropes. She loves the water as you did – and due to a freak accident already broke her leg and now we’re back at Holistic doing hydrotherapy. The smell of the water takes me back to you 0-60 and I just bury my face in her fur and remember all our rehab days. She’s not quite as graceful as you were – but she’s young. I know you’re her guardian angel – so you know your work is cut out for you – ha!
Oh sweet saucers, I miss you, my girl. As Elvis sang so eloquently, “i can’t help falling in love with you” and I do every day as I remember how amazing and how special you were. It wasn’t about losing the leg, or the eye, or the challenges that went with this, your warrior spirit and tenacity prevailed overall and I hang on to that daily.
Celebrating you my baby girl – my snarky saucer butters. You would be 15 today – 2/22/22 – special numbers for a special girl.
I know you’ve been struggling with this anniversary and I have watched you ponder on what you could write today, so I’m taking it out of your hands. I am still the boss, after all.
I know this night 3 years ago was the hardest that either one of us endured together. But you were brave. And I know you would have moved heaven and earth for things to be different – but guess what – now I get to move heaven and earth, so to speak (I promise, no earthquakes will be at my paws). The Universe and I have a very strong bond. Like we do.
I know you’ve been super lonely without me. Yes, Dora is there, but we know she’s not the same as me. Cats – I mean, what more is there to say? Especially that quirky feline.
I know you know I conspired with the Universe back in January. I decided it was time for you to open your heart up again and I knew you wouldn’t do it on your own. Do you know what it took to align this plan? To find a little pup who was a golden (ok, half), same color, and special needs? I mean I only had one good eye and three legs the last couple years – but I brought you one with one nostril – I didn’t want it to be too similar. And to top it off I made sure it was named after a fruit – because then I knew you wouldn’t / couldn’t resist. You’re welcome. Kiwi became your new focus.
I know it’s been a rough few months with her – puppies – i mean need I say more? They’re cute, but they’re puppies – and because she did not grow up with her siblings or mama, she was (is) extra. But I knew you were up to the task. I know you doubt yourself often, but hey, who knows you better than me? I know she tries your patience every minute and I know you’ve kept that protective coating around your heart, but I see it melting a little. Keep doing what you’re doing.
I know I made sure she was a little like me, enough to warm your heart, but enough to be her own dog. I know she will carry on our legacy, but no one will ever replace what we have.
I know these anniversaries are hard for you – but we both know I’m not far away. Look through our pictures and remember all our laughs and good times and the love most of all – we had the best love.
I know when the time is right, we’ll be back together, but in the meantime, you have life to live and Kiwi to love and my legacy to keep alive. You got this mom.
I know my first breath wasn’t with you, but my last breath was and that created the shimmering thread that binds us forever between our worlds.
I love you mom and I know your heart is made of pure applesauce – and now with a side of Kiwi. (sassy sweet-tart, she is)
14 years ago the Universe deemed this feisty red-headed spirit had a purpose on earth. She was born on February 22, 2007 – one of a litter of 6. She was the only red, a big feisty pup. Eightish weeks later she began her journey to capture my heart and soul and she did it without me even realizing what she was doing. She filled a void that I didn’t even realize was there – full of unconditional love, snark, comedy and so much more.
(i’m the big red one right in front)
She was usually a happy girl (but she had a strong snark and was stubborn as could be when she wanted to be) She loved people (with the exception of a couple), especially HER people, other dogs, car rides, swimming, walks, a good stick, happy dancing, new toys, old reliable babies, treats, hugs and snuggles, and a good nap.
Our goal in her later years was for her to be trained to be a therapy dog as she naturally gravitated towards those she knew that needed that extra rub, lick, paw placement. Unfortunately, during this process, her own health issues cropped up – first with a nasty case of glaucoma which took months (and an insane course of drops and meds), when finally a switch of doctors (thankfully) ended all that and we did an eye ablation. So she couldn’t see out of that eye but looked as beautiful as ever). Add in a couple of oral hematomas just for fun too. However, just when we thought we were out of the woods, Feb 1 2017, fate struck again with the osteosarcoma diagnosis and throw in a side of malignant melanoma under her tongue, because why not?
Ever the warrior, she was resilient in her efforts to fight her battle and did it with grace and undying spirit. She was my guiding light, my source of strength and inspiration to fight on her behalf. Almost 3 months after diagnosis, amputation was the lightswitch that gave her a new “leash” on life. Her gifts to give were my lessons to learn and that continues to this day.
She may have left physically in November 2018, but her spirit has remained and is stronger than ever. Her goal to becoming a therapy dog came to fruition in the spiritual world as she has befriended another golden in Michigan. She never met this dog physically, but the signs and situations that have occurred cannot be explained as coincidence or imagination. More on that story to come. But it’s fact that she does have a charge by the name of Easy in Michigan (who is a therapy dog herself). We know when she’s there and we know when she’s home.
We also know she’s currently involved in another project here – time will tell soon on that outcome. She’s always in cahoots with the Universe. Typical Applesauce.
Applesauce is and will always be my heart dog. I miss her more than words can describe and I talk to her every day. So today, we will celebrate her being, her gifts, and her lessons. Happy B-earth-day my silly Saucers. #shelivedherbestlife